You're destroying your child's motivation and self-esteem when you allow them to think they don't have to work for anything because it's 'owed' to them. The story's told of a telemarketer who phoned a house, saying: 'I'd like to talk to the person who makes the final purchasing decisions for the family.' The woman replied, 'I'm sorry, that person is still at kindergarten and won't be home for another hour.' Cute story, but not so cute when it is reality. Parent, love your child, provide them with opportunity and a secure home environment, but teach them to be responsible. This sounds like a no-brainer; so why don't we do it?
1) Misguided love. We say, 'My kids shouldn't have to struggle like I did.' Your children interpret that kind of indulgence as lack of interest; you taking the easy way out. As a result their demands increase because what they're really saying is, 'I don't really want more stuff, I want you!'
2) Low expectations. As a parent you owe your children a chance to excel in life. Don't rob them of the fulfillment that comes from working hard to improve their grades, clean their room and earn their way.
3) Guilt. We all feel bad about not spending enough time with our kids, or having failed them. One seventeen-year-old told her dad that he 'owed' her a car. And she got it! Why? Because her parents were divorced and Dad felt bad about 'letting her down.' Don't try to buy your child's affection, you'll only end up paying later. God corrects His children; you need to correct yours!
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